Chidimma Writes

  How Social Media Noise Is Changing Our Values The world today is polluted with noise; noise shaped by people’s perceptions and beliefs. It overwhelms me sometimes as I try to understand what truly matters in life. Everywhere, there are opinions: “Marriage is not an achievement,” “A man will…” “Women are…”, and so many others. These voices have created confusion, turning everyday life into quiet chaos. Growing up, I can attest that the noise was minimal. People had privacy, and no one seemed to be in a rush. Maybe it was because I hadn’t seen the other side of the world yet. But now, it is exhausting to witness how much things have changed, from simple to complicated, from calm to chaotic. Sometimes, I wonder what life would have been like if social media had never introduced these endless comparisons and artificial standards. Today, many people live based on what they see and hear online. They go to great lengths to align their lives with curated realities. “I want glass skin,” I...

  HOW MUCH I IGNORED MY MOTHER I had written something for Mother’s Day. I had prepared a piece. But then, something struck me: REFLECTION . I sat quietly that morning. The sun had not yet embraced the sky, and dusk still lingered softly. And I asked myself: Why do I celebrate Mother’s Day? Why am I writing about it? Do I truly have a reason, or am I just following a trend? Then, the memories came...flooding my mind like a waterfall in Enugu. I remembered the days I resented my mother. The times she scolded me harshly for things I knew I was guilty of. The day I told her I was bullied because of my body, and instead of comforting me, she asked if I truly was what they called me, rather than teaching me to fight back. Oh, my younger self! how little you understood. I see it clearly now. She corrected me so I would fear wrongdoing. She allowed certain struggles because she believed they would make me stronger. I may not know much about other mothers, but mine taught me lessons that s...

 The Prayer That Ended a Love I Thought Was Right Every year after my first breakup with Paul, a lot of things happened that reminded me of the same dating mistakes I made with him. I never believed that dating in school was trashy because I believed love could find you even at your lowest. Destiny had convinced me of that. After Paul, I did not take a long break like many girls or women usually do after a breakup. Only three months later, I accepted to start something with a new guy I had just met. Unfortunately, trying again was not worth it. He was worse than what I had run away from. The relationship lasted for three months and one week. After it ended, I decided to take a break that lasted three years. It is funny how time flies. When I later calculated those years, I was amazed. With the anger I carried, I chased my dreams with great determination. I told myself there would be no more lovey dovey distractions. Sometimes I feel we need an emotion to electrify us into reaching ...

  DOES BODY COUNT REALLY NOT MATTER ? "You owe no one the number of your body count.” When I was in my mid-teenage years, the phrase “body count” confused me. I wondered what it meant until I came across it in a novel at a friend’s library. I cannot remember the title now, but I remember that it was written by a Western author and it was worth every second of my time. After learning the meaning of body count, I began to question whether it was simply an illusion, a juicy bait used by society, or just a fictional idea within the world of that novel. The thought stayed in my mind like a stubborn bug, making me overthink during my leisure time as though I had been hired to conduct research on the subject. “Having too many body counts does not matter,” a friend once told me during a girl-to-girl conversation. Her reasoning surprised me. I remembered my mother once explaining that sleeping with too many men could make a woman lose the value she carries. According to her, a woman’s dign...

 “ How Time Steals Dreams We Never Act On ” Time is a vengeful agent. It keeps ticking and never pauses to meet the expectations of man. It existed before creation and has never stopped ticking till today. Over the years, many people lose track of time and suddenly realize that they left their beautiful dreams unrealized. They failed to do the right things while there was still time. According to the Preacher in the book of Ecclesiastes, everything has its timeframe. Whether small or great, under the sun or above it, time respects no one. I once had a deep conversation with a young man who told me how he spent his prime years in reckless habits. I was fascinated by his story, yet as I reflected on it, doubts filled my mind. In a person's lifetime, the twenties are often the prime years for planning what life should become in the next two decades. The thirties, in many ways, reflect what was built in the twenties. Although many writers encourage people to “wait for their time,” the ...

  THE LIES I BELIEVED ABOUT MYSELF So many things have kept me drifting on waves and shadows. Reading stories, articles, features, novels, poetry, and comics shaped my lifestyle and made me believe deeply in the tyranny of my fantasies. Sometimes I wonder if they truly exist, or if they were just a juicy bait writers used to soothe our imaginations while we read. Maybe you have believed this too, in different ways. Growing up, I believed everyone would love me because I was smart and intelligent, perhaps a rare pearl. Reality struck in middle school when the bullying began. I started believing that the only way to keep people was to become weak and allow myself to be used. That was the lie I told myself. I thought friendship meant sharing everything you had: your knowledge, your time, your strength. Little did I understand that sometimes this was only a euphemistic form of exploitation, not unconditional love. I always believed real friends would tell you when you crossed a boundar...

  Why People Say “I Don’t Know What They Want” — When Deep Down They Do Understanding fear, independence, and the psychology behind human decisions. The lie many of us tell ourselves is that we do not know what we want, when the truth is right before us, as clear as glass. It is not that we do not know; we simply do not know how to admit it. The fear of hurting people, or losing the comfort we currently enjoy, often prevents us from admitting the truth. Everyone knows what they want and need at different points in life. The real problem with humans is the fear of losing what we already have because of our desires for something different in the future. Our cognitive behavior is shaped by the environments we grew up in, the circles we keep, and even the programs we watch repeatedly. However, parental influence happens to be one of the primary sources of this fear. Many people grow up to become partially independent and dependent, some become solely independent, and others become sole...