THE LIFE I MISS

 How Social Media Noise Is Changing Our Values

The world today is polluted with noise; noise shaped by people’s perceptions and beliefs. It overwhelms me sometimes as I try to understand what truly matters in life. Everywhere, there are opinions: “Marriage is not an achievement,” “A man will…” “Women are…”, and so many others. These voices have created confusion, turning everyday life into quiet chaos.

Growing up, I can attest that the noise was minimal. People had privacy, and no one seemed to be in a rush. Maybe it was because I hadn’t seen the other side of the world yet. But now, it is exhausting to witness how much things have changed, from simple to complicated, from calm to chaotic. Sometimes, I wonder what life would have been like if social media had never introduced these endless comparisons and artificial standards.

Today, many people live based on what they see and hear online. They go to great lengths to align their lives with curated realities. “I want glass skin,” I once heard a friend say, someone who could barely afford two decent meals a day. Skin is not meant to be glass; it has pores, it breathes, it lives.

We now live in a world of classifications. Men must be this, women must be that. A man who loves his wife deeply is called a simp. Pink is no longer just a color...it is “not for men.” A man drinking a smoothie is judged. These labels, these noises, have quietly ruined lives.

Some masculinists preach that spending on women is a waste, while some misandrists; mistaking themselves for feminists, promote immorality as though it were normal. In all this, the true meaning of balance and respect is lost.

The pressure to acquire what others display on social media is alarming. People chase appearances, often at the cost of their values. Here in Nigeria, hard work is increasingly seen as a slow and foolish path. Wealth is measured by luxury cars and expensive phones. Respect is reserved for the rich, while the poor are treated like a virus; avoided, dismissed, and unseen.

I miss the world I knew as a child.

I miss when children played freely, and when a stranger correcting a child was seen as care, not offense.

I miss when people helped quietly, without announcing it to the world.

When marriage was not a transaction, and love was something pure and beautifully understood.

When I watch birds fly across the sky, I notice they wear no special outfit, yet they are beautiful. They do not compete; they move together.

Even the neighbor’s cat sits and licks its fur without worry, existing peacefully.

But man; man tries to prove everything. He fears death, yet can take life. He envies, destroys, and steps over others as if they never existed.

I miss simplicity.

I miss when my friends did not judge me.

When I was not dismissed or gaslighted for speaking about morality.

When no one tried to use me as a stepping stone.

When beauty was not measured by appearance, but by character.

Today, the world is filled with noise

and that noise overwhelms me.

—Chidimma Writes