Sometimes I think we override life with our wishes.
I believe everyone must have passed through phases in life when some of our wishes become realities at the time we no longer think about them or even need them.
Growing up, we wished for a life not filled with uncertainties, drafting maps of the future as if we controlled everything.
I remember friends who wished to get married in their early twenties, to recreate Rita Dominic’s marriage ceremony which was the highlight that year, to be like actress Sharon Ooja in her movie Still Falling, and many others. But it is funny how time changes how people feel about everything they once fancied.
I was not an island. I made the same wishes and birthed wild imaginations about love, pain, wealth, shame, poverty, and even what people would feel like if I fell asleep and never woke up again.
Life is indeed full of stress. Nothing is ever free. You work to get what you need and want, and somehow you may still end up with nothing at all. Sometimes I wonder what makes life fulfilling at its fullest. I see people drive expensive cars, throw big parties, eat good meals, and still long for more, while an average person like me struggles for that same life.
Many people say, “Love without money does not work,” yet even the rich still wish for love.
Why would someone wish for love when they seem to have everything to command it?
I once wished for my love life to be rosy, but as I grow, reality has shown me that love is not enough. Alignment, commitment, and consistency matter more.
Life can be comical today, tragic tomorrow, and stormy in the future. We cannot control outcomes, and overthinking everything only makes us wish desperately without deeper reflection.
Sometimes, wishes come during moments of struggle when we do not truly need them, and like dew, some of them dry out. I feel this happens because God wants us to understand why He does not choose certain paths for us. It becomes a win if we have prayed over it before sinking into the intensity and breaking at the reality.
James and John, the sons of Zebedee, wished to sit at the right and left of Jesus Christ in His kingdom, but He corrected them, pointing to the process and sacrifice required for eternal life.
In our everyday lives, we never stop wishing. Sometimes detachment comes when our wishes become realities. I used to feel guilty when I walked away from relationships that drained me instead of building me, but as time passes, I find myself becoming more intentional about what I tolerate.
They say consistency is authenticity, and I believe I have found my circle.
There is a verse in Amos that says two cannot walk together unless they agree. I remember reading it to a friend, thinking I was going to change him, but now I realize I needed that verse for myself. If our values do not align, detachment becomes necessary.
A friend once asked me, “Even if they are good people?”
I went quiet, allowing my mind to process the weight of the question before responding.
And yes, even if they are good people. I am not ending relationships out of bitterness, but growth does not always carry everyone along. Sometimes, we lose people in the process.
I believe our wishes should be grounded in reality, not driven by emotions or societal pressure. After our first heartbreaks, many of us wished our exes harm, forgetting how much we may have hurt others too. The heart does not seek permission from the mind on whom or what to love.
When making a wish, let it be of good value, not because of the trends we see around us.
I do not think we have to override life with our wishes. Let life and time take their course while we pray and work with faith, humility, gratitude, and hope.
“Wishes are the easiest to make, just like promises are quickly spoken when emotions rise.”
—Chidimma Writes
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