WHY DO I LIVE?
When Osundare called time vengeful, I argued within my mind that he was being harsh. But life unfolds in many unpredictable ways. Dreams sometimes remain unfulfilled. Many “had I knowns” and “how I wish” fill the spaces in people’s lives, and gratitude comes only in brief glimpses of what feels like an expected end. Somehow, I ask myself if this expected end truly exists, because we bend our backs every day working hard for a cause we often create from other people’s stories, judgments, and perceptions, while those same people are still struggling with their own problems.
When I was younger, I was told that if I studied hard, I would have something to enjoy in the future. No more sleepless nights and burning lamps. But as I grow older, life becomes even tougher in that same future.
The poor struggle to eat, and the rich, who seem to have everything the poor man desires, still work tirelessly, leaving no space vacant. Is this what we call the expected end? An end that is timeless, without rest, and filled with endless labor?
Why do we live if life is not satisfied with luxury or even with survival? Many philosophers have tried to explain what fulfills life.
Emerson believed that fulfillment comes from self reliance and purpose. According to him, a fulfilled life is not about pleasing others, but about being true to oneself. He emphasized that success is measured by the impact we make, how we live with integrity, how we help others, and how we remain authentic despite societal pressure. To be yourself in a world that constantly tries to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
Frankl, on the other hand, taught that fulfillment is rooted in finding meaning, even in suffering. In his view, life becomes fulfilling when we discover a purpose, whether through work, love, or courage in hardship. He argued that those who have a reason to live can endure almost any situation.
Having read all these, some doubts still linger in my mind and raise difficult questions.
Being true to oneself is not always easy. As a survivor, there are moments when one has to become what they are not, stepping into unfamiliar roles just to keep going. All my life, I have tried to remain true to myself, yet people see me in many different ways. While others see me as a writer, my mother sees me as a teacher, a chef, a doctor, a nanny, a data analyst, a journalist, a poet, a future mother, and so much more. It becomes overwhelming, and saying no creates a tension I do not like to face.
Sometimes, I feel like leaving everything behind in search of a place where I can find contentment. But the only final escape is death, and death without fulfillment feels like a loss too great to accept.
Watching people struggle and compete as though their lives depend on it makes me wonder what would happen if we chose to move more slowly and live more steadily. Many people focus so much on their goals that even when they reach what they once called the expected end, they fail to recognize it.
Life is not fulfilled by luxury or by lack. The only thing that truly fulfills life is the peace that comes from Christ. A peace that makes love easier, hope stronger, and faith flow through us like blood through our arteries.
Even at death, a life built only on outward display can still feel incomplete. A fulfilled life is not defined by wealth or appearance, but by the positive impact we make and the meaning we carry beyond this life.
-Chidimma Writes
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